Saturday, March 19, 2011

THOSE WACKY BLOOPERS -- AND A CAUTIONARY TALE


About once a year someone sends me one of those collections of “church bulletin bloopers,” and they actually make me laugh. Some of the perennial favorites:

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."
The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing "Break Forth into Joy."
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
These are funny because they are most likely real bloopers – not made up. (At least I’m convinced.)

The blooper phenomenon brings to mind a sort of sub-category: the danger of the find-and-replace feature in word processors. Here’s one that most certainly had to have happened, because it could happen to me tomorrow:

The preacher discovered that his word processor allowed him to save the bulletin of his last funeral service and use it as a template for the next. One week it was a funeral for “Mary Jones,” a couple of weeks later a service for “Agnes Schultz.” He simply replaced every instance of one name with the other. Those attending the service that week were amused when, in the creed, they confessed belief in a Lord who was “born of the virgin Agnes.”

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